RTAH Friday
Real, True, Actual Headlines
... and more!
NYTimes.com
NASA suspends shuttle program over foam debris
That should be okay ... just don't launch it next to foam debris!
Study says popular Herb has no effect on colds
Mr. Herbert Shankle, although a favorite among co-workers, cannot magically cure common cold, as he claims.
E.P.A. holds back report on car fuel efficiency
Until just after you buy your next car!
Revolution on the radio
Because the revolution will not be televised!
BBC.co.uk
Distant object found orbiting sun
No, that's not right ... we already knew where the sun was.
Space check for shuttle damage
We'd prefer space cash, thanks.
Uganda votes on electoral change
But results retroactively overturn themselves.
MSNBC.com
Democrats want age limit on Web porn
Nekkid grannies not to their taste, I guess.
RTAH Wednesday
Real, True, Actual Headlines
... and the comments that seem silly.
MSNBC.com
GM to end its employee-discount program
... due to embarrassing lack of employees.
Stem cells heal spinal cords in study on rats
... but rat health insurance generally doesn't cover procedure.
Microsoft begins new piracy restrictions
From now on, they will oonly steal the ideas of really small companies.
The fight to keep analog cell phones
These people are living in the stone age!
BBC.co.uk
Police arrested over Kenyan brew
There's a limit to how bad coffee should be.
Nine 'women clerics' defy Vatican
Pope gives in.
Axing faith schools 'not the answer'
The axing faith loses another battle.
Fewer hospitals get three stars
Not enough sick actors to go around, I guess.
Japanese develop 'female' android
Don't ask.
UK 'hacker' fights US extradition
Severe cough may lead to repatriation.
NYTimes.com
Motorola unveils thin phone for e-mail addicts
Paper-thin phone can actually be mailed, company says.
Pataki decides to forgo a 4th term, confidants say
Finally, reluctantly decides he can't be Governor of New York and President of the US at the same time.
RTAH Monday
Real, True, Actual Headlines
... and the comments I thunk of.
MSNBC.com
Shuttle may fly with glitch
Will stay up until late December to protect the Christmas of the "Who's."
Generic drug maker Teva to acquire Ivax
I thought they only made sandals.
Related headlines:
● KFC still guards Colonel's secret recipe
● Calif. inmate sues over fingertip in dinner
So, it's not the breading, it's the "chicken?"
NYTimes.com
Upheaval continues in San Diego as 11 vie for mayor
Candidates make voters literally sick.
What Bush doesn't know
Long list follows.
BBC.co.uk
Ringtone ads face stiff controls
No ads for Viagra, then?
Suspect bombers 'still at large'
Not only do they throw bombs, they brew hooch, too?
First broadcast for Latin channel
Really limited, but very loyal audience.
Mystery China bug toll reaches 17
Mothra.
Shooting victim had expired visa
Man, these British guys are tough!
Ancient phallus unearthed in cave
You dig in the ground, you gonna get dirty.
Strange headline of the day:
Albatross chicks attacked by mice
